Back To My Old Tomfoolery

I’m back to my old tomfoolery again.

Tuesday I ventured, yet again, into the world of that which grows (for other people).

The week before, while checking out several stores for a bistro table, I found a plant I felt would look great in an empty corner of our bedroom.

For most, this would be a non-story, but for me, those of you who’ve been around for a while know that I’ve got what you could call a woeful history with the world of plants.

For those of you who don’t know, in a nutshell, I have a terminal influence on plants under my supervision. Really, I’m just a complete walking plant disaster, no matter how great my efforts or how lofty my intentions. So I knew, when I saw that plant, that I should just walk away.

So I walked away.

And then, I kind of, sort of, well, walked back again on Tuesday, for the sole purpose of securing one of those plants for my very own self.

I chose the exact plant I wanted from the available selection, and then turned around. There, across from the plants I had just picked through, were two shelves of clearance plants.

I tell you, Lowes is a place without mercy for people like me, discounting their half-dead plants with reckless abandon.

It was then that I heard a small voice beside me.

What happened next is really all a blur.

But I do remember this.

You know the little preschool-aged girl with blonde hair and glasses, the one who always seems to appear wherever I am for some reason?

She made me do it.

“Mom, let’s get more plants!” she exclaimed, literally doing a little hop of excitement as she said it.

I’m sorry to say I acquiesced.

In my defense, this was the only other plant I purchased from the clearance rack. I promise. This had nothing to do with the fact that every other plant was at least 82% dead, making it the sorriest lot of clearance plants I’ve ever seen.

No, it was all about willpower.

Oh, and it seems I did also walk away with a Venus flytrap I discovered right next to the clearance rack. But it was small, so it didn’t really count. And the small people have been highly interested in Venus flytraps lately (plants native to a relatively small area along the North/South Carolina border near the coast, by the way), so I was buying it primarily for my children’s educational benefit, which automatically uncounts it. Or something like that.

After we were home from the store for a while, baby-girl came running up to me, a bit agitated. “Where’s the pegasus?” she asked. I paused for a minute to digest this one.

“What pegasus?” I asked, bemused.

“The one we just bought at the store,” she answered, and putting two and two together in a way that only a child’s own mother could and remembering that I had moved the Venus flytrap while she was in another room, I questioned, “Do you mean the Venus flytrap?”

“Oh, yeah, yeah,” she answered, a little excited now.

I have no idea how she morphed “Venus flytrap” into “pegasus.” But she did.

Anyhow, we’ll see how this latest voyage into the land of that which grows will go, if I will ever turn the tides on my future in this arena.

Actually, I’m already off to a dismal start, as I just realized I still haven’t watered my centaur.

I mean dracaena.

Good thing it’s labeled as being tolerant.

7 Replies to “Back To My Old Tomfoolery”

  1. Nice pegasus! The boys especially will love it. We had a young boy in our homeschool group that cultivated them for a science experiment. My boys loved watching them “eat” the bugs. You are so brave to bring one home. As for the gorgeous plant featured first, you can feed it a can of flat beer about once a month to help it grow. Enjoy your new plants!

    1. Thanks. We will certainly try to enjoy them. And thanks for the flat beer tip, something I’d never know otherwise. Yes, my younger son is deeply concerned that the pegasus won’t get enough bugs to survive and wants to try to collect some bugs with his bug catcher equipment so he can feed it. We’ll see.

  2. Here’s hoping the plants survive! 🙂

    1. Thanks. Say a prayer! 🙂

  3. I admire your plant-growing tenacity! My boys beg for Venus Flytraps every time they see one at the store. The only thing keeping me from buying one, other than my black thumb, is the thought that it might need bugs to survive. I don’t care for bugs in the house, especially on purpose. Love your baby girl’s pegasus!

    1. Oh, I know. And the directions say it doesn’t matter if you feed it or not, or if it’s inside or outside, but I’m not buying it. And it’s starting to look a little weary even though I bring it outside every day for “feedings.” This time of year, we have way less bugs around, too, so I don’t know. LCB’s already saying I’ve killed it.

      1. Sigh. LCB. ((shakes head)) Maybe your baby girl can be your cheerleader on this one. 😉

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